I've begun to spend a few minutes every day reading my twitter feed. Here are ten of my favorites from the last hour...
Ricky Gervais @rickygervais
Dress old people in inflatable full body suits. If they fall over they'll just bounce. Got to do something. We're running out of hips.
Anita S @Chezhdchick
How much douche could a douchebag douche if a douchebag could bag douche? #imimmature #youknowwhoimtalkingabout
Darren Marlar @darrenmarlar
Huge thanks to the drunk 18-wheeler driver who swerved into my lane three times this morning; I am no longer struggling to stay awake.
Huffington Post @HuffingtonPost
"It's cheaper than a massage" -- author on why she drinks
Fred Winston @FredWinston
Watching Ann B celebrate Puertrican heritage on @WGNMorningNews I yelled, "Shake it baby" at home before Larry did on the air.
New York Daily News @nydailynews
I am too fat to be executed, says 480-pound man on death row
Gawker @Gawker
The secret Mitt Romney video as explained to a five-year-old through a YouTube animal video http://gaw.kr/7v2WZD
Rob Hart @RobHart1980
The guy who sat in front of me at the Sox game was a weapons-grade dumbass. His wife, too
WCKG Chicago @WCKGChicago
WCKG is back. 9-19-12
Ricky Gervais @rickygervais
Despite the Royal Family pushing for an injunction to ensure my breasts are never seen in public, here they are...